Oh, To Be Young

 

 August Alsina

Like I said before on many occasions, “There is a difference between being real and being rude.” Before I saw this interview clip circulating all over the web, I didn’t even know who August Alsina was. Unfortunately, I guess that I will never know him because after seeing this god-awful response he made AND after listening to him talk about this situation on the Sway in the Morning show, I became no longer interested in knowing what he was bringing to the table in regards to music.

I understand that people are not perfect. I also understand that many people come from rough upbringings and blah, blah, blah. I am definitely one of those individuals that came from a rough upbringing and had to deal with a lot in life. BUT I also know that I am not gonna let my crazy past ruin my future or be justification for doing dumb sh*t. Period. As far as I’m concerned, you may have a rough past but there are millions of others that have one just as well. It is up to YOU to rise above it and not carry that heavy load everywhere with you.

Okay, so this young lady on 106 & Park decided to ask August a question that apparently, he didn’t want her to ask. Word around town is that he asked the people on the show not to ask questions in regards to his issue with the r&b singer, Trey Songz. Okay, I get that. Maybe she shouldn’t have asked him that question. I get that too. However, it is up to you as an artist to handle that situation correctly. Considering the fact that August is a new r&b artist, he needs every ounce of media outlet there is. In other words, don’t be the new kid on the block that’s burning bridges. You may not be able to control a person’s action but you can control your reaction.

As I was reading responses from people online in regards to his attitude on the show, a lot of people (including myself) felt like he was disrespectful and out of line. However, there were other people who felt like because he’s from New Orleans, he had every right to respond the way that he did because people from Louisiana “don’t play that”, as one idiot pointed out. I was rather appalled to see how so many individuals (mostly all Black) loved the way that he responded because he was “keepin’ it real” or “keepin’ it 100” or “he’s a real n*gga”, phrases that are constantly used to justify ignorance.

So August Alsina, since you’re such a “real n*gga”, you shouldn’t have no problem with what I am about to express to you in regards to your conduct. So here it goes:

Considering the fact that you are very young, I’m not gonna be too hard on you. You’re just barely old enough to legally drink so therefore, I can’t expect for you to have a good amount of wisdom at your age. I also want to point out to you that although your behavior on 106 & Park was less than cute, I still hope that you have a great career and do abundantly well. However, having a PR rep is extremely fundamental to your career because had there been one present (or a good one), that person definitely wouldn’t have been pleased with how you conducted yourself on this show.

Even if you’ve warned the people on the show to not ask you about Trey Songz, you still have to learn how to handle yourself as a professional when that camera is on. If you don’t believe me, take a good look at all the greats that were before you. Oh yeah, they may have been a**holes behind the scenes but they made sure to be on point when it came to their career. So with that being said, when you were put in this uncomfortable position and were asked a question that you didn’t feel comfortable answering, a better response could’ve been something along the lines of “That’s in the past and I’ve moved on since then. So I don’t even wanna talk about that anymore. I wish Trey Songz the best and that’s all I have to say about that. Right now, I’m focused on my career as an artist and moving forward.” See how simple that answer was? It was to the point and shade-free. The host would’ve gotten the point and let that be that.

When you were asked about the 106 & Park incident on the Sway in the Morning show, I expected for your attitude to be a just lil’ better but instead you kept ranting about how you’re not a p*ssy or a pushover along with the response of, “If anybody feels like I disrespected her, well, fuck you too.” Considering the fact that I think Sway is an awesome brotha and a professional at radio, I was rather disappointed that he was okay with how you were acting and seemed to be encouraging it. August, let me help you understand something: There was NOTHING okay with how you responded to that young lady on 106 & Park.  If you want to be an underground artist, your nasty approach would’ve been perfect. But if you want an everlasting and remarkable music career, learn how to handle yourself when it comes to certain situations. 

If you take a moment to at least try to change your attitude, you will have the opportunity to build relationships with people who can help take your career even further than you’ve ever imagine. You don’t have to change your personality in order to get to great levels in life but at the same time, no one wants to deal with someone who’s known to be an a**hole or hard to get along with. Please know that had you been interviewed by Oprah or the hosts of Good Morning America and you responded to them the same way that you responded to this girl on 106 & Park, your career would’ve been damn near over by the time the camera crew went home.

And let me help you with something else: Being from Louisiana doesn’t mean a thing. It just simply means that you’re a brotha from Louisiana. Anyone with common sense is not gonna be intimidated by you just because you’re from Louisiana. Who cares that you’re from Louisiana and that you so-called “don’t play.” Honey, there are people from Wisconsin who also “don’t play.” Being from Louisiana doesn’t mean that you’re exempt from being put in your place when you’re wrong. Furthermore, if you want to claim that you’re not a p*ssy and a pushover, that fine. However, considering the fact that you chose to respond to this girl’s question in a ridiculous manner, you made your own self look like a p*ssy. Take heed to what I’m saying, my brotha: Ignorance and arrogance is a bad combination.

Please forgive me if I sound like I’m being harsh. If anything, I want you to win. I truly mean that. Handle things the right way so that you won’t have to pay for it later. If you can’t handle a simple question, how in the world are you going get thru all of the shadiness of the music business that’s gonna come your way? Maybe sista girl was indeed trying to play you by “going against the grain” to ask you that question but you had the opportunity to handle it the right way. It’s not her that needs that platform to promote music; it is YOU.

Don’t listen to the cheerleaders who thinks that it’s great to be rude. If your career was to come to an end and the money went away, you can best believe that the cheerleaders won’t be around to lend you one dollar. They will be cheerleading for someone else while talking dirty about you behind your back. And no, I’m not judging you. People are so quick to use the “don’t judge” scripture as a crutch when actually they do need someone to call them out on their b*llsh*t so that they can do better. If you are a good guy like you proclaimed on the Sway in the Morning show, let us see that side of you. Learn how to play the game before the game plays you. That’s all I’m saying.

Sonica

Copyright © 2014 by Sonica Jackson

***The views and opinions expressed here on my website are solely those of myself and do not in any way represent the views and opinions of WordPress or anyone else.

 

Pros and Cons of Gentrification

(Photo credit: www.dailymail.co.uk)

Many people have expressed their feelings in regards to gentrification, which is the process where land developers buy and renovate homes in poor neighborhoods so that the middle-class people can take up residency. This causes the low-income families to have to deal with the dilemma of looking for residency elsewhere.  Some people are for it, some people are against it, and some people have mixed feelings about it. Not too long ago, I had a conversation with my father in regards to what he felt about gentrification and he didn’t seem to be in favor of it at all. Land developers were starting this process in his neighborhood and because he is a tax payer, he knew that the changes in his neighborhood would effect the taxes that he’d have to pay for his property.

Although I understood his point of view, I was still on the fence of whether or not gentrification was the wrong answer to rebuilding many of these neighborhoods that were neglected. As I thought more and more about this subject, I realized that there are some positive attributes in regards to the subject as well as the possibility of it having a negative impact on the lives of those that have lived in these communities for many years.

On one hand, gentrification can cause the neighborhood to not only look way more appealing, it has the possibility to lower the unemployment rate. For example, there’s an urban area in Pittsburgh that’s called East Liberty and several years ago, the area looked like the aftermath of Vietnam war. There were plenty of houses that were abandoned/boarded up, potholes were all over the place (just like Cleveland), and the landscape looked unkempt. Once land developers started to take over, changes happened and they happened immediately.

They tore down the abandoned eyesores and started building up a great amount of businesses that not only made the area look more appealing and inviting, you can best believe that it also brought more revenue into the city. Due to the growth of the area, more people are able to get a job which means that there’s a possibility that the unemployment rate will go down. More young professionals visit East Liberty and it has become the area that people are desiring to move to. They have great attractions and since the Google headquarters is located right there and they are planning on hiring thousands of individuals for their corporation, I guess it’s safe to say that East Liberty has been saved from being completely destroyed.

On the other hand, there are some main downfalls of gentrification and one of them is the possibility that many people will get pushed out of their homes due to the changes to neighborhood. People that have lived in their neighborhood for years may get forced to move out once a land developer gets the green light to develop in that community. This means that many people have to move to certain areas that they’re not accustomed to. Some may feel that this type of change is not a big deal but for some, leaving behind good memories and a neighborhood that they love can be a hard pill to swallow.

Another issue at hand is the major possibility of property taxes increasing for those that choose to stay in the revamped neighborhoods. For some, it may just be a small pinch to their wallets. For others, that pinch may feel like a punch and unfortunately the rise of the property taxes on their homes may cause them to relocate. Furthermore, many from the Black community believe these types of changes will drive out a certain class of people such as Blacks and low income families.

I can totally understand the concerns of the Black community in regards to this because that could be considered discrimination. However, on the flip side, gentrification will reduce the undesirables (thugs and gang bangers) from tearing up the new neighborhood because they will not be allowed to live in those areas. Let’s be honest; no one wants to invest money into an area, fix it up, and allow the same individuals to live there and tear it all apart. So as of right now, I look at gentrification as a good and bad thing. Although it may drive some people out of their neighborhoods, sometimes we’re left with no choice but to trust the change or things in the neighborhood may get worse.

Sonica

Copyright © 2014 by Sonica Jackson

***The views and opinions expressed here on my website are solely those of myself and do not in any way represent the views and opinions of WordPress or anyone else.

The Video That Shook Facebook

As I was cruising thru my news feed on Facebook earlier this week to see how everyone was doing, I came across this video that was rather insightful and on point. The lady in the video is named Melissa Ortiz and she asked the question of why Black women are so arguementative and what Black women need to do about it. Although I loved the video and it is a great topic of discussion, there were two things that I found questionable and I will get to that in a minute. But the first thing that I wanna do is point out that I myself get so sick and tired of Black women always feeling the need to argue about any and everything…especially about things that hold NO value.

There are healthy arguments (which are called ‘debates’) and then there are unhealthy arguments (which are called ‘wasted energy’). Unfortunately, many Black women do have the tendency to argue about things that are not important and the end result can sometimes cause a serious wedge in a relationship that can last for years if not handled properly. As I get older, I find that I don’t feel the need to argue much about anything because it stresses me out, ruins my day, gives me a pounding headache, and it will cause my blood pressure to run high as a kite. So I avoid it as much as possible. Besides, once I make my point about something, I’m done with the matter and I walk away, leaving the person to sit and stew in their own anger juices. Trust me, it works.

But there are two statements in this video that she made, that I have to question:

1. Melissa Ortiz asked “Why are Black women so argumentative?…We don’t consider it a good time unless we’ve been arguing and fighting with someone over something.” Well, if she was talking about some of these reality tv shows, she would be totally correct. But her question was “why are Black women so argumentative” which means that she’s talking about Black women in general…and that’s not a fair comparison. I can’t speak for anyone else but as for me, I absolutely hate to see my sistas arguing and fighting and rather see us laughing and enjoy life like we should. This is why I don’t watch fight videos of my Black people because I hate to see us looking like some untamed animals. With that being said, I have to disagree with Ortiz on this statement and say that there are a vast amount of Black women who don’t express themselves in an argumentative way. For those of us who are mature, we try to find ways to handle conflict in an adult manner. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. That’s life. Furthermore, there are those Black “men” who are just as argumentative as a Black woman.

For example, when one of my Facebook friends downloaded this video onto their page, there was one gentleman (and I use that term VERY loosely for this particular person) that decided to challenge two Black women that made comments about the video. Instead of it becoming a healthy debate where everyone would at least try to learn from each other’s point of view, it was more of mud-slinging, disrespect, and name-calling that was actually brought on by this one Black man! How ironic is that! It wasn’t even the two Black women who provoked the argument.

From the comments that I was reading from the two women, they were expressing why they felt the way they felt about the video. They believed that Ortiz had some valid points but they were trying to express their own point of view as to why they disagreed about certain things. Instead of this particular Black man understanding where the two women were coming from or at least agreeing to disagree, he decided to take things to a totally different level that was extremely childish in every aspect of the word. And we wonder why “Black women are so argumentative.” Well, if you have a Black brotha that is blatantly disrespecting you, how else are you suppose to act? Some of the god-awful things that he said were so offensive, that it would’ve shamed his parents and the woman that he claimed he had.

First of all, I said this before and I’m gonna say this again: Men (especially Black men) are supposed to be leaders. So if you are a leader, that means that you have to lead by example. The example that this particular guy was leaving for these two Black women was a horrible one. You can’t expect for certain Black women to change if you’re not giving them a reason to. If you are a man that don’t like women who are argumentative, then don’t be the type of man that starts arguments. If you start leaving better examples, you can best believe that Black women (the smart ones) will catch on and want to be better in how they handle conflict. Trust me on this.

As far as I’m concerned, I LOVE a man that I can learn wonderful things from. Great attributes in a man will make a woman wanna change some things about herself for the better. We all have flaws and need to improve in certain areas of our lives and we all need someone special in our lives that can help us improve in those areas. But how can you be that man to set the example for Black women if you are tearing Black women down and calling them outta their name? If you create a hostile environment, you’re gonna get hostile results. So let us learn TOGETHER how to effectively communicate with each other.

2. Melissa Ortiz said, “The solution is to close your mouth.” Well, I agree AND disagree with this statement. One part of me agree with this because like my grandma used to say, “Only a fool argues with a fool.” Sometimes, when you know that you’re in the presence of a fool, it doesn’t make sense to argue with them. I wish that the two ladies that was going back and forth with this particular individual on Facebook had grasped the concept of that and just left the platform with Mr. Man looking for someone else to argue with. In this case, the solution definitely would’ve been for them to close their mouth because silence can sometimes be the best answer that you can give someone. Truth be told, silence can be louder than any spoken words. Not only that, sometimes you may end up saying the wrong thing that can cause the demise of your friendship or relationship.

I took the liberty of checking out a few more videos from Ortiz and from what I gather, she is a very smart, articulate, and fascinating woman with great points of views on what Black women should do to not only better themselves, but to better their relationship with their significant other. The great thing about her is she actually reveals her own imperfections to her audience. We all need to take a good look at ourselves, be honest about the imperfections that we see, and do something about them.

However, the “closing of the mouth” is not the solution to everything. In order to get to the root of the problem and try to fix it, we need to discuss it. Sometimes, a closed mouth can paralyze you to accept whatever is thrown at you. For example, if a man is cheating on his woman and/or abusing her, shouldn’t she say something? Shouldn’t she explain to him how his behavior is effecting her? Shouldn’t she tell him that his mistreatment of her is hurting her? Or should she just close her mouth and not express her hurt and anger, while continuing to be mistreated? I hope you guys understand my point. Closing your mouth is a great solution to many things but the best solution to a problem is to learn how to communicate better.

Sonica

Copyright © 2014 by Sonica Jackson

***The views and opinions expressed here on my website are solely those of myself and do not in any way represent the views and opinions of WordPress or anyone else.

Fix Your Family

Okay. So once Thanksgiving dinner is over, the turkey is gone, the table is cleaned off, your good dishes are put away, and everyone has gone home with their bellies full, what’s next? After all of the pleasantries and warm welcomes, is the family gonna keep in contact with each other more often or keep their distance until the next holiday?

See, it’s hard for me to understand the true meaning of family because of the ridiculous examples that I see in my own family on both my mom side and my dad side. Don’t get me wrong; I do love all of my family members. However, I find that we can be so very selfish and not put in more effort into spending more time with each other. We rather hold secrets from one another which doesn’t do anything except cause a wedge that’s hard to get rid of. We don’t know how to effectively communicate with each other and when I try to make an attempt at it, my efforts go unnoticed.

It’s a hard pill to swallow but I had to face the reality that my family on both sides are kinda segregated. We don’t love each other the way that we should and when we finally realize it, it’s too late. From what I’ve noticed, there are at least four reasons why my family (and many others) are segregated:

          1. We only show our faces during funerals, holidays, and family reunions. Why wait until some dies to show your half-ass attempt of loving your family? Why wait until you see someone’s lifeless body laying in a box to wanna show that person some love and respect? If you didn’t love or respect that person while they were here on earth, save your crocodile tears for someone else. Stop waiting until you get to a funeral to then realize that “life is too short” and talk about what you should’ve, could’ve and would’ve done while the person was alive. Furthermore, the holidays are meant for you to spend with people that you love and cherish. So with that being said, don’t show your face at someone’s house on the holidays when you know damn well that you can’t stand that person. We all know that you just there came to eat the food. The sad part is that the food was prepared by the person that you dislike. And as far as family reunions, they only happen once a year or once every other year. If you only show your love during that ONE occasion, you need to stay home and stop frontin’.

          2. Family secrets. They are the kiss of death when it comes to family. A lot of family issues don’t get resolved because when people say that they wanna “keep it in the family”, what they are really saying is that only one or two people should know what’s going on. People don’t realize that when a family member has screwed up, that’s the time when everyone is supposed to come together and help that person get their life together. Having a healthy family support system is very important and so when you have a couple of individuals that wanna keep family secrets, it becomes damn near impossible to break generational curses because no one is wise enough to talk things out in order to get to the root of the problem. Translation: Stop being so tight-lipped.

          3. Gossip. Although we need to come together as a family when there are problems, we need to learn to stop gossiping about each other as well. There’s enough gossip in the media to entertain us and we need to keep it there…not in the family. Sometimes it’s hard to open up to a family member when you know that all they’re gonna do is get on the phone and tell all of your business to the next family member that is willing to give that person a lending ear. This is very common with the elders in the family that are always looking to get into somebody’s business, like busy bodies.

          4. Grudges. We say that we have forgiven someone but yet every time that “one person” enters the room, we burn with anger. This can effect the entire family because they can feel how thick the tension is when you two are around each other. And with a tremendous amount of tension in the room, nobody can really have a great time at the family function because they’re afraid that at any moment, somebody’s gonna flip out. Understand something; people are not perfect. If the problem can be fixed, do just that and move on.

          5. Cliques. We have all been in high school where you had a couple of cliques around the school; the geeks hung with the geeks, the pretty girls hung with the pretty girls, and the corny people hung with the corny people. It may not have been right but that’s how high school was. But creating a clique within the family should NEVER exist. Yes, it will make sense to hang with the relatives that are your age. But the problem is that we tend to act like other people in the family don’t exist and we only want to have relationships with people that we have known for a while. We don’t wanna develop a relationship with so-and-so because we don’t know them well and so therefore, we destroy relationships before they even have a chance to form.

          6. Bad Communication. When I was studying communication in college, I learned that not a day goes by when you are not communicating. Even when you are silent, you are still communicating. Many families (such as mine) have absolutely no idea how to effectively communicate with each other. Instead of sitting down and talking things out like adults, we have screaming matches that’s filled with a bunch of name-calling, obscenities, and back-biting. This problem can be an easy one to fix just as long as people in the family will learn to put the childish attitudes aside and learn to LISTEN. When people learn how to listen, that can prevent a problem from growing into a serious issue that can take years to correct. Translation: Learn how to talk to one another.

In a nutshell, don’t wait until a holiday, a birthday party, or the death of a loved one to show your love to those that you are supposed to love. Learn to love everyday and let everyday be Thanksgiving. Don’t wait until you’re ninety-years old with no teeth to wanna “work things out”. Show everyone immediately how important they are to you. It’s not about being needy but sometimes a person wants to feel wanted. Men say this all the time about women. They don’t like to be with a woman that acts like they are not needed. They want to know that they are an important factor in a woman’s life. Use that same principle when it comes to dealing with your family. Show them how much they mean to you and that they are needed in your life. Let your guard down and love them the same way that you wanna be loved. Believe me, it will make a huge difference. And you don’t have to wait until someone cooks a turkey in order to do this.

Sonica

Copyright © 2013 by Sonica Jackson

***The views and opinions expressed here on my website are solely those of myself and do not in any way represent the views and opinions of WordPress or anyone else.

Mona Scott-Young

(Photo credit: www.newsone.com)
In all honesty, I absolutely love the fact that there is a driven Black woman who is making a name for herself in the entertainment world. No, she’s not an entertainer but she is the brains behind such television shows like Love & Hip Hop that airs on channel VH1. There are two versions of the show: Love & Hip Hop of Atlanta and Love & Hip Hop of New York. Every once in a while when I had spare time, I used to tune into Love & Hip Hop of Atlanta for giggles (especially if I was watching with my sisters because I loved their comical commentary) but I absolutely refuse to watch Love & Hip Hop of New York after I saw the Chrissy and Kimbella brawl.
But something happened with me: I quickly started to see that the older I got, the less that I started to tune into the show. I didn’t care about who was sleeping with who or who didn’t like who. My taste started to change dramatically and I became more interested in things that had nothing to do with slaps, punches, and weave-pulling. Although Mona is a very successful and smart business woman with a vast amount of power in the world of television, I found myself not being interested in Love & Hip Hop anymore. Of course, many of us love to stay tuned into a show that’s either full of drama or extremely uplifting. And if we was to really be honest with ourselves, we all love to watch some drama unfold on TV. But sometimes, enough is enough.
The violence that is being exposed on this show has been raising some eyebrows and putting Mona Scott-Young in the public eye as a bad influence on the Black community. To be honest, I don’t think that she’s a bad influence on the Black community. She’s not responsible for those that CHOOSE to watch her show and she’s not responsible for the actions of those that are on her show. However, I will say that since she’s the one that is allowing for certain things to be exposed on national TV, she’s partly responsible for the outcome. But to say that she’s a bad influence is highly unfair, especially if we’re not willing to take responsibility for our own actions.
For example, if you have been one of those individuals that has taken your cell phone and recorded a fight between a couple of young men and women and then decided to upload the mess onto the internet for the whole world to see, then you are just as much of a bad influence as anyone else.
We all need to do better. And honestly, I have no problem including myself in that equation. I don’t fight but I will admit that there have been a few times when I have viewed a fight video that was made public and I forwarded it to someone else. I realized that my action contributed to the destructive behavior of the Black community that we have yet to eliminate.
We can’t say that the state of the youth is completely messed up whereas we as adults are the ones that are not giving the youth better examples on how to live this thing called life. Stop saying that the youth is in trouble when it’s actually the ADULTS that are in trouble because we are the reason that the youth is in trouble in the first place. Whether you believe it or not, the youth will follow the actions of the adults and their actions will eventually become a replica of what they’ve learned from us. So if we’re not willing to do better in how we respond to conflict, don’t expect the youth to be willing to do better. We need to care more.
I’m not saying that we need to be perfect in order to reach the youth. We as adults will never be perfect. Unfortunately, there’s gonna be times in our lives when we don’t have no other choice but to kick a lil’ ass. But if you actually HAVE A CHOICE, make the right one. Too many of our beautiful Black children are losing their lives everyday to nonsense and it’s mainly because we keep letting the mess slide, our stupid behavior keeps getting exploited,  and we ignore what’s really going on. You can pray for the youth all you want to but we must put forth some serious action on top of it to change some things around. Stop being a cheerleader when it comes to people kicking each other’s asses and start a trend where the youth will see how cool it is to act like you have some sense. If we start making better choices on how we deal with people AND THAT BECOMES A TREND, maybe Mona Scott-Young will be willing to create a show that caters to that.
Sonica
Copyright © 2013 by Sonica Jackson
***The views and opinions expressed here on my website are solely those of myself and do not in any way represent the views and opinions of WordPress or anyone else.

Things That Broke People Do

Let me inform you: I’m not rich. I don’t own a mansion, I don’t own a fleet or cars, I don’t have millions of dollars in the bank, I don’t have a maid, and I don’t own a ton of businesses. But what I do have is a goal and the drive to get to where I’m going…and I’m not gonna let anyone or anything stop me. It may be a long road but to be honest with you, I have been receiving some amazing blessings along the way which makes me push even harder to have success. Of course, material things don’t have the ability to make me happy but I’m not gonna fake the funk; I like nice things just like everybody else.

But what drives me crazy is when broke people talk a good game about what they wanna do but they’re not willing to put forth the effort to do it. I’m not saying that there’s something wrong with people who are going thru struggles. I’m not saying that at all. We’re human. We’ve all been thru a lot of struggles and sometimes it gets hard to maintain your head above water. Believe me, I know a lot about that kind of life. But struggles are not supposed to last for the rest of your life. And yes, sometimes we make foolish decisions that can cause us a headache but God always provide us with a way to fix a situation.

However, it’s ridiculous when broke people have the resources to do better but yet, they don’t take full advantage of them. So therefore, they end up staying in BROKEville. It would be more understandable for a broke person to be broke simply because they don’t have any means or opportunities to have a better life. But 99.9 percent of the time, broke people remain broke because they live off of excuses and they don’t try hard enough. Welp, if you are one of those individuals that don’t do anything but complain about being broke, here are a few helpful tips to encourage you to make a change:

1. STOP taking your last dime and spending it on foolishness. Quit running ya’ ass to the corner store, spending your last five dollars on crap that you don’t even need. Doritoes, Beer, Black & Milds, and Jolly Ranchers are not going anywhere. Take that five dollars and save it for something else.

2. Stop saying, “Sometimes, you gotta do what you gotta do.” That’s been the broke person’s anthem for years to come. If you are doing what you gotta do, that’s because you’re not doing what you should do. Stop contaminating your mindset with those words and work on doing better so that way, you’ll be doing what you LOVE to do.

3. Stop living above your means. You know damn well that you don’t need to be buying a Louis Vuitton purse when you are making Taco Bell money. You can’t even afford to buy a fake Louis Vuitton. So get a grip.

4. Stop renting overpriced furniture and flat screen TV’s from rental places. You’re only buying that crap so that you can show it off to people who really don’t like you that much.

5. Quit complaining about ya’ damn job! You know doggone well that your boss came from the pits of hell and that she likes to micromanage her employees as if they’re kids. She’s miserable as hell and mad because she ain’t got a man although she’s been praying for one. So instead of complaining, look for somewhere else to work so that you can be removed from her tentacles. I know that the economy is crap but keep on looking. And if all else fails, take the money THAT YOU WERE ABOUT TO WASTE ON A NEW HAIR WEAVE and apply that money to a business venture of your own.

6. Just because you saw your favorite celebrity sporting Ray-Ban sunglasses doesn’t mean that you need to run out and get you a pair. They’re nice but if you can’t afford them with the kind of money that you make, leave them alone. Translation: Don’t go broke trying to live the glamorous life.

7. STOP SLEEPING ALL DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How in the hell do you expect to be successful when all you do is lay in the bed and watch reruns of The Golden Girls?!?!?! You should be starting your day at either 5 or 6am in the morning. You can’t afford to go to sleep because you can’t afford to be broke.

8. Don’t take ya’ damn income tax check and spend it on a living room set. You know damn well that you are knee-deep in debt and your student loans are in default. So use that money wisely. You may not be able to pay off everything with that one check but you can at least pay off ONE thing. Translation: DO RIGHT.

Good day.

Sonica

Copyright © 2013 by Sonica Jackson

***The views and opinions expressed here on my website are solely those of myself and do not in any way represent the views and opinions of WordPress or anyone else.

The Common Denominator

Every once in a while, I like to share some of the experiences that I have gone thru or what I have seen other people go thru because I believe that a person’s experience can help others. So today is one of those days where I feel compelled to share one of my experiences as to why I believe that it’s important NOT to be a hater…but to be hated on. Now although I’ve touched on this subject just a lil’ bit with a few people that I have spoken to in the past, I feel the need to reiterate just a lil’ further so that people can really get it. So here we go:

Don’t get mad with others that choose to follow their dreams and you choose to give up on yours. If you do not make it in this world, it’s nobody’s fault but your own because YOU ARE THE COMMON DENOMINATOR. Plain and simple. If your dreams seem like they are not coming true, keep on pressing towards the mark and you will see the results. If it happened for someone else, it can happen for you. Pray hard and work hard.

Maybe you will have to sell your home so that you can have the money to put into your business. Maybe you will have to move to another state where the market is better. Maybe you’ll have to trade in your Mercedes for a Toyota so that you will have the extra money you need to make your dream happen. Find out what the is problem and find out what it takes to solve it. But don’t just sit around and hate on others for pursuing their dreams and making it happen. That’s just wasting a bunch of time and you have NO idea what it was that they had to go thru in order to make it.

A long time ago, I worked at this corporation where I started to notice that the females in management didn’t bother the people who were content with the job. They didn’t bother the people that didn’t have any ambitions beyond that point. When word got around that a person was launching a CD or whatever it was that a person felt passionate about, management found reasons to terminate that individual. One of my coworkers was terminated because she was very attractive, extremely smart, and well-liked by everyone. They hated her because of her beauty and the fact that she had a go-getter type of spirit. Make no mistake about it, folks: when people see a light shining on you and they see that you’re tapping into your inner power that God gave to you, some folks who have a truck load of insecurities will become intimidated by you.

I know that there’s a virus going around called ‘Black Folks Hating On Other Black Folks’ but there’s an antibiotic for that and it’s called, ‘Act Right.’ So I said all of that to say this: If you are one of the ones that is always getting hated on and especially by your own kind, don’t worry about it. Prepare yourself for your dream and let your mind be on that. If you have a vision, go for that vision and make it happen. This also means to fund your dream. Put money into it. If you have a day job, take a portion from each check and invest it into your dream so that you won’t have to spend the rest of your life working for other people that don’t give a damn about you and will throw you away like yesterday’s garbage.

Now please don’t take what I say and lose your damn mind. I’m not telling you to go to your day job in the morning and beat the hell outta your boss with your fist pumped in the air, talking about, “Hey assholes! I quit!” What I’m telling you to do is use your head and use money from your job to pursue your dream. Don’t worry about the haters. Let the haters worry about themselves because when the smoke clears, they will crash and burn. Maybe the haters haven’t realized that God gave everyone the same inner power as He gave someone who is pursuing their goals.

So to all the haters out there in the world, remember this: Just because you chose not to tap into your own inner power to make things happen for you, doesn’t mean that others shouldn’t tap into their inner power. Don’t be mad because someone’s light bulb is shining bright and yours is dimly lit. Good day, people. 🙂

Sonica

Copyright © 2013 by Sonica Jackson

***The views and opinions expressed here on my website are solely those of myself and do not in any way represent the views and opinions of WordPress or anyone else.