Choose Wisely

Let me just say this for the record: I’m not interested in getting married at all. I’m very turned off by the whole idea of it. It’s not in my plans and I have absolutely no use for it. Some people devote a lot of time into looking for their enchanted love and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. If you want a spouse, a couple of kids, and the house with the white picket fence, that’s more than fine. I’m not against anyone wanting to get married. If you invite me to your wedding, I’ll be there. But as for me, marriage is not in my plans.

But ladies, for those of you that want to get married, don’t marry someone if you are only marrying the person because you’re afraid to be alone. Whether you believe it or not, your loneliness will not be “cured” by simply walking down the isle. If you get married due to loneliness, you may find out very quickly that you’ve made the wrong decision. Not to sound corny but the only one that can help you get thru your ordeal of loneliness is God because if you’re not satisfied with being single, chances are that you won’t be satisfied being married.

Let me be real: It makes my heart bleed when a woman marries a man that she knows is not meant for her and then she spends astronomical time complaining about him to everyone that she knows. If you knew damn well that Tyrone was a piece of crap BEFORE you married him, there is a ninety-nine percent chance that he will remain the same after he walks down the aisle. So stop complaining.

Nobody wants to hear about how fed up you are that Tyrone lays his fat tail on the couch, not even making an attempt to help you take care of the household. You knew doggone well that he was jobless when you met him and that he wasn’t interested in working anywhere. We don’t wanna hear about how Tyrone’s chain smoking is giving you a headache even though you knew that he was a walking ashtray before he said ‘I do’.

When you gave birth to his child, it became one of the most bittersweet moments of your life because Tyrone’s ‘inner asshole’ had surfaced and made its presence known in your home. Instead of Tyrone helping you with the baby, you find yourself doing all of the work and you are resentful of your baby sister because she is always partying her tail off and the only dilemma she has to face in life is figuring out which Chanel bag goes best with the new outfit that she just bought with her American Express credit card. You’re upset with your mom because she just snagged her a twenty-something year old boyfriend who is screwing her brains out and she doesn’t have time to babysit lil’ Jessica and change her diapers, feed her, rock her to sleep, and clean up after her.

You most certainly can’t call your homegirl Yvette to help you out because you haven’t spoken to her since you’ve cursed her out when she tried to warn you about Tyrone’s disgusting and cheating ways. Although a couple of her blouses are stained on the shoulder area with your tears because you kept on crying to her about Tyrone’s indiscretions, you’ve still decided to place Yvette on your hit list.

Your boss at work has given you your last warning of you coming to work late and being absent excessively due to your inability to pay for a babysitter. Although Tyrone (with his no-job-having self) is more than capable to babysit his own child, he refuses because he claims that he’s so busy trying to concentrate on how to get to the next level on Candy Crush. This makes you angry and you complain to him about his negligence when it comes to lil’ Jessica but then again, the triflin’ negro doesn’t even tend to the other five kids that he has with other women.

See what happens when you settle? See what happens when you allow loneliness to overwhelm you? To this day, I know of a few people that were extremely desperate to get married and when they got married, they quickly realized that it’s a very hard thing to adapt to. They became miserable and started to miss the ‘single life’. See, that’s what happens when you become anxious for something that you are really not prepared for. Then you start to think that maybe you should’ve bought a puppy instead. So take your time, learn to love yourself, and simply enjoy every moment for what it’s worth.


Copyright © 2013 by Sonica Jackson

***The views and opinions expressed here on my website are solely those of myself and do not in any way represent the views and opinions of WordPress or anyone else.


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